Alice Donovan Rouse

Tim Ferriss once said, “A person’s success in life can usually be measured by the number of uncomfortable conversations he or she is willing to have.” The same can be said about relationships.

Before committing yourself to someone for the rest of your life, you need to have some tough conversations. Here are five things you should discuss with your partner before tying the knot, no matter how uncomfortable it may be:

Your political views
People have varying tolerances for political disagreements, and in today’s polarized political climate, it’s important to make sure your potential spouse doesn’t hold any beliefs that are absolute deal breakers for you. A person’s perspective on politics says a lot about their values, which will eventually reflect in other aspects of life.

How you expect to divide work, in and outside the home
Make sure you and your partner support each other’s desired lifestyles and career goals because you don’t want to end up facing expectations that you never signed up for. If your lifestyles and goals aren’t compatible, you’ll need to figure out a compromise so that nobody feels pressured to give up the future they imagined for themselves.

What kind of family you want
The desire to have kids or not have kids can be a deal breaker for many people. If you’re both unclear about whether or not you want kids, how many you want, or how you want to raise them, then that could lead to some serious conflict in the future.

Where you envision yourselves
People love to dream about different places they could live one day, but if you ask your partner to realistically predict where they’ll live in five or 10 years, you might get a different answer. Make sure there’s at least one place you could live where you’ll both be happy.

What role your extended families will play in your lives
When you commit to someone, you’re also committing yourself to their families, for better or for worse. But that doesn’t mean they have to be involved in your lives. If you know you’ll have issues with the in-laws coming over every weekend, speak now or forever hold your peace.

xx, The FabFitFun Team