Your best friend is getting married and she chose you to be a bridesmaid – maybe even the maid of honor – and with that, comes a wave of responsibilities.
If it’s your first time fulfilling any bridal party duties, we’re highlighting eight tips below to ensure you’re fully prepped.
Ask the bride what her expectations are
“After the [initial] excitement has subsided, the best thing you can do is discuss your roles and responsibilities with the bride. While there are things that the maid of honor traditionally does, nothing is set in stone. If this is the first time you are both doing this, then you want to be clear from the get-go, so no feelings are hurt,” says Kevin Deniss, certified planner and president of Wedding International Professionals Association.
Identify important dynamics
“Ask early if there are any family (or friend!) sensitivities that you need to know about,” advises Kylie Carlson, CEO of International Academy of Wedding & Event Planning. “More than likely, you will already be aware, but it doesn’t hurt to just circle back if, for example, a sister-in-law is upset she’s not included in the wedding party. Very much like the vendors who will be hired for the day, it’s good for you to have a heads up on any potential challenges.”
Cover all the bases, and delegate when necessary
There’s a lot you may be doing as a bridesmaid or maid of honor including dress shopping and coordinating the bachelorette party and bridal shower. After you set expectations with the bride, delegate appropriate tasks. If you’re not coordinating one of the events, check in regularly with the appropriate family member or bridesmaid to see if there’s anything you can do to help. If you are coordinating, ask for help.
Communicate with the bridal party
You’ll be spending quite a bit of time with a group of people you may or may not know yet. Start a group text to exchange information, communicate budgets and schedules, and get to know each other a bit. You can also communicate about event budgets to make sure all the girls are able to participate in all that is planned.
Bring a wedding emergency kit
Hand sanitizer, bobby pins, mini hairspray, safety pins, breath mints, sewing kit, ibuprofen, water, tissues, tampon, stain remover, oil blotting sheets, and makeup should be easily available on the big day.
Put personal preferences aside
“As a bridesmaid or maid of honor, you play an important part [in the wedding], but the bride should always be the focus,” says blogger Annie Brown. “Dresses aren’t your style? Is wearing your hair up not your favorite? This is ultimately her vision of her wedding day and your job is to do everything possible to make it a reality.”
Bring joy, not stress
Wedding planning and the wedding day can rustle up a lot of stress for a busy bride. Your job is to decrease that stress. Bring the fun, highlight little moments, and offer a shoulder to lean on. Intervene when you see a high-strung family member making a beeline to your bride with a list of questions. You are the mom-ager. Celebrate your girl as though she is Beyoncé herself.
Go above and beyond
Bring champagne to her hair appointment, help the groom find a gift, send flowers to her work, write her mom a sweet card, drop off flowers at the wedding night hotel, have all the bridesmaids write notes, and help out as much as she’ll let you.
xx, The FabFitFun Team