The sex is awesome, the conversations last for hours, and you just can’t get enough of each other. Ah, yes, the first six months of a relationship are a magical time. But fast-forward a few months (or years – or decades!) and things may seem a little… well, boring. After the honeymoon period fades, how do you keep the flame alive? Here’s some advice from three experts (hopefully none of them are in the middle of a nasty divorce):
1) Try something new. Even a small change in a routine can inject new life into a relationship. Try an activity that produces an adrenaline rush, suggests relationship advisor and therapist Dr. Terri Orbuch. Go river rafting, take a salsa dancing class, or ride a roller coaster together. “The arousal will get transferred to your partner and relationship.”
2) Change the script. Instead of rehashing the same old topics, set aside some time every day to talk about something fresh. “Make lists of things you don’t know much about and subjects [that] pique your interest,” suggests Sally Landau, a relationship mentor and certified life coach. “From something on this combined list, take a class together or read the same book and discuss it.” His exes are something you don’t want to put on the list (although we’re sure it piques your interest).
3) Stop and smell the roses. What made you fall for each other in the first place? Was it their sense of humor? Their dance moves? Their sense of humor about their dance moves? Remind each other what you love about them, and “be explicit about what you appreciate,” explains Marty Babits, couples counselor and author of The Power of the Middle Ground: A Couple’s Guide to Renewing Your Relationship. “This builds trust and repairs damage.”
So, now that you know how easy it can be to jumpstart your relationship, what are you waiting for? Get out there and spice things up!
Xx, The FabFitFun Team
